Cat Wearing Orange Glasses Watch Review

Long overdue, I now present for you a review of one of the greatest watches of our time: the infamous cat wearing orange glasses.

Available with at least 5 different colours of PU strap, this former staple of the unbranded AliExpress unisex watches is the quintessential chrome-plated timepiece for cat lovers everywhere.

When ordering one, I recommend you choose the "green" option. You won't actually get a green strap, but a more pale aqua colour instead. I have no idea why this is, but ordering "blue" will get you a navy blue strap, and none of us want that, do we? Some might call the "green" strap "baby blue" or something even more popular.

Whatever the case, the Tiffany blue faux-leather strap makes this dial really pop, and people will comment on your watch as a result. Whether you want those comments is another matter.

Not to be confused with Taylor Swift's now extremely overpriced homage featuring Benjamin Button from her "You Need to Calm Down" video (which then came as part of the limited edition release of her CD album), the unbranded cat watch is also getting harder to find. In fact, the last place I saw this luxury timepiece for sale was on Storenvy at 4 times the price than it used to be.

So what are the specs? No, not the orange ones on the cat's fizzog, but the dimensions. The case measurements are a perfect 38mm with 18mm lugs, and a thinness of only 7mm. This makes it suitable for men, women, girls, boys, and everything in between. Unfortunately, it is still slightly too big for actual cats unless you attach it to their collars. They won't be able to see it there though, but as cats are myopic, they would need glasses to see the dial even if they could wear it on their paws. Orange glasses, maybe?

Lug-to-lug length seems slightly too long at 47mm, and with no curve to the lugs, this isn't an unpretentious watch that someone like TGV could ever wear. He wouldn't have the good taste or street cred to pull off this look anyway, and with a weight of almost 25g, it would be far too heavy.

In fact, not many people can wear one of these high-quality timepieces in public without getting beaten up for it and having it stolen from them, not even Paul Thorpe! That's how popular this watch is!

As you can imagine, other cat-themed homages already abound including this horridly overengineered thing by Gucci (above) and the minimalist but 3D version for those like The Time Teller who want something gold-plated and more tactile (below).

There is nothing printed on the caseback or the advanced Chinese quartz movement inside, so it is unlikely that these watches could ever be traced to a specific manufacturer.

With hands reminiscent of a Calatrava, however, the odds are in favour of this awesome watch having been created by none other than Patek Phillippe. Let's be honest here, they don't sell a lot of their other models so they must need the money. The fact that there's not even a seconds hand on the newer version gives it away really.

In summary, the unbranded cat wearing orange glasses watch is an affordable luxury which will provide some much needed verisimilitude to every social occasion. A simple strap change to a more conservative colour will make it ideal as a dress watch for those very formal occasions where you might meet royalty.

But is it the purr-fect watch for you?