This #1wc Challenge has been the Apple of My Eye!

Thanks to @BadgeHoarder for making my challenge fairly straightforward! Hopefully the demand as to Fluffy McNicholson is well received....I'd certainly like to be paid for my work -- with a #1wc winner's badge!

Below are images of the letter as drafted (and as it is intended to be seen) -- there's a lot of joking around in there, so I hope you all can appreciate it! I had fun with the letterhead, especially.

For those that can't see the images, the text of the body of the letter is below.

Dear Mr. AngelFireJolie:

Please be advised that the Law Office of Dewey Cheatem Screwem & Howe, LLP represents Hercules McFakerton (“my client”).  This correspondence shall serve as my client’s demands for redress for the following behavior of your pet, Fluffy McNicholson (“Fluffy”), a canine of unknown breeding.

My client’s allegations are as follows:  On or about June 1, 2023, your animal, Fluffy, lunged at my client, who was standing on his front lawn as he was setting the time on his Zelos Mako Frost GMT watch, thereby causing my client to drop said watch onto his lawn in surprise, following which Fluffy ingested said watch.  Although we cannot be certain of the rationale behind Fluffy’s behavior, upon information and belief, he was inappropriately enraged beyond all reason by the fact that the watch had a bezel and dial whiter than Fluffy’s own fur.  While my client understands and is sympathetic to the fact that Fluffy may have had some prior psychological damage inflicted upon him as a result of having been pressed into serving as a beast of burden for his master’s entire watch collection worth tens of thousands of dollars at one time[1], this cannot excuse Fluffy’s conduct in absconding with my client’s property when he returned to your care.  As Fluffy’s owner, you are solely and wholly responsible for his conduct.

Needless to say, given that my client’s watch was part of a limited run of only 150 examples, this watch holds considerable meaning and value to my client.  Demand is therefore hereby made that you: (1) immediately surrender custody of Fluffy McNicholson to my client within five (5) calendar days of the date of this correspondence; and (2) within thirty (30) calendar days from the date of this correspondence, pay the sum of One Hundred Thousand United States Dollars ($100,000.00) to my client to reimburse him for damages suffered as a result of Fluffy’s inexcusable conduct, which include, but are not limited to: (i) the costs of the supervised extraction of the watch from Fluffy’s bowels; (ii) the costs of a complete stripdown, cleaning, sterilization and servicing of said watch; (iii) the intentional and/or negligent infliction of emotional distress caused by Fluffy’s actions; (iv) my client’s loss of consortium with his watch; and (v) his attorneys’ fees and costs incurred to date. 

Following the turnover of custody of Fluffy McNicholson, he shall be taken to a veterinarian for the appropriate extraction of the aforementioned Zelos Mako Frost GMT watch from his bowels.  For this purpose, my client has retained the services of Dr. Uncontacted Tribesmen, whose office is located at -6.704983°, -72.758681°, State of Amazonas, Brazil, 69000-011.  Following the extraction of my client’s property from Fluffy – be it through natural or surgical means (to be determined at the sole discretion of Dr. Tribesmen), he may be retrieved at the aforementioned office.

Should you fail to accede to and comply with the demands contained in this correspondence within the timeframe provided, we will be forced to conclude that you do not intend to voluntarily cooperate, and that legal action against you is required to recover my client’s property as well as reimburse my client for the damages he has suffered. Please be advised that should such further legal action be required, Hercules McFakerton, as prevailing party, would be entitled to reimbursement of his costs and attorney's fees directly from you, in addition to all amounts awarded for damages.

 If you have any further questions concerning this matter, please address your response to this office in writing.

 PLEASE BE GOVERNED ACCORDINGLY.

Very truly yours,

 /s/ Jay Bird

JAY BIRD, ESQ.

FOR THE FIRM

 cc:        Hercules McFakerton

            Thomas Dewey, Esq.

[1] Please note that we are in possession of photographic proof of this incident.

AND NOW ONTO THE NEXT CHALLENGER!

This one is going out to @Bayl61. Hercules' 11th labor was the recovery of golden apples which belonged to Zeus and their delivery to Eurystheus. The apples were guarded by Ladon, a hundred-headed dragon, but also by the Hesperides -- the nymph daughters of Atlas. Along the way, Hercules had to learn the location of the garden, and how to get the apples. In the end, he learned from Prometheus (after killing the eagle that kept eating Prometheus' liver repeatedly) that he couldn't be the one to recover the apples -- he had to send Atlas to get them for him while he held up the world for Atlas. Since Atlas hated his burden, he agreed to Hercules' request, but when he came back to Hercules, Atlas told him that he'd deliver the apples while Hercules held the load for the rest of time. Hercules agreed, but managed to trick Atlas into putting the apples down and holding up the world again by asking Atlas to take over so that Hercules could put on padding. After Atlas held up the world again, Hercules grabbed the apples and ran. Ironically, Eurystheus couldn't retain the apples because they belonged to the gods -- so Hercules had to return them.

@Bayl61 your challenge is actually very simple, but you will need help for it, just like Hercules did. Your task is to take a photo of your watch while it is being worn with a golden delicious apple which is being held. In the spirit of Hercules' labor, however, you can't be the one to recover/be holding the apple or be wearing the Duro for the photograph. Someone else has to do it for you.

Given the simplicity of this task, I think that 36 hours should be reasonable and sufficient time to complete it. It is presently 6:15 p.m. EDT/3:15 p.m. PDT/10:15 p.m. GMT on June 22, 2023. You have until 6:15 a.m. EDT/3:15 a.m. PDT/10:15 a.m. GMT on June 24, 2023 to complete your task (@Aurelian, challenge is out). On your mark, get set, GO!