Not Madly Me-- why is liking what we like so important?
My mother had this phrase, generally applied to clothes that my father had chosen for her: "not madly me." It was always interesting to me that what was so Madly Me to one person was so...not to another.
My parents had great and far-ranging tastes. Even as a child, I recognized this. Even as a child, I didn't share a lot of this. Despite their tutelage-- and their eye-rolling-- I always had a much narrower range of what was acceptable to me. And what I liked was always the plainest, most workaday object or iteration. No to the delicate European antiques or art. Yes to the pine Shaker table, to a black and white photo. No to lace, yes to a Hanes T.
This is Not Me:
This is Me:
The thing is, most people have their Me and Not Me, and I wonder why it is so meaningful to us. I'm not talking about social signifying, which is a whole other and beyond-well covered section of the library, but rather of why--just in our relationship to ourselves-- we want certain things around us or on us. And why, if something is Not Me, it can feel so alien.
So of course (you are all so patient with me, if you're still here) this is a paramount issue in Watchlandia. In a recent Watchfinder video (who I'm not tagging this time, bc creepy stanny), Andrew Morgan said about I-forget-which-watch,"I'd look like a fool, wearing it." It seemed hyperbolic, and yet completely relatable.
When I look at a watch on my wrist that isn't Madly Me, my wrist looks foolish to me. It looks foreign, Capgras. Even if I think the watch itself is lovely, It. Must. Come. Off.
And it's not just watches that I own (or borrow). Although I know, after years in Watchlandia, how good this is,
This is Not Me:
I will admire it, if you have it; I will turn it over in my hands, if you let me. I will look at it under a loupe, if you want me to. I will enjoy this time together, you and I. But inside, I won't feel anything towards the watch except for a disinterested awareness of its quality. (And yes, that goes for all the independent gods above the Lange; I'm a lazy poster in terms of visuals.)
Maybe it's that: the lack of internal resonance, a void, that makes something alienating or not...? Help me out here, watchfam.
This is Me:
And yes, I know that this is pretty silly. And just TBH, I could afford the Lange (I'm old and have a lifetime of saving behind me, so don't fret)...and I don't want it. Which has something to do with values (another post, you lucky-duckies), I suppose, as well as with the aesthetic Me. But that's a whole 'nother can of worms-- when something is Madly Me, but not attainable for you. Hoping people will weigh in on that.
Madly Me can be seemingly innate, which is odd but charming-- some core self that emerges a priori into the world. It can also change over time, from internal or external forces. What does it say about me that my Madly Me has barely budged for 60-plus years? I'm not sure anything good, but it may be that I yam what I yam.
My minimalism is fighting it out with my covetousness: enthusiast or collector? My retirement fund looks on in horror. Rara avis, here-- female watch geek-in-(only five years on) training. Photos will...
I get it. I don’t want stuff I don’t like…I’d prefer to have stuff I like.
I tell my kids to always try something new cause they’ll never know if they’ll like it. But as you mature, you know what you like and don’t want to waste time or money on what you don’t.
Hey [redacted] people that feel they must have a chronograph, a diver, a GMT, a [expletive] Tiffany blue dialed watch, get in here!
I feel you have your own identity and are rational, so you will never be a perfect watch idiot savant.
Honestly, I have distinct preferences, mainly preferences against things. However I do have the "costume of the day" (e-point to whoever names that reference) mentality that horologically identifies with Edina Monsoon when she stood in front of her closet saying ~"Who do I want to be today?" But there is a narrow range of people that I want to be. I'm not totally crazy. Just a little.
The title of The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit (film and novel) was supposed to be a criticism of post-war careerism and consumerism. What if you kind of liked the suit (sans hat)?
I liked this look and the look of the watches of this era. The first watch that I ever bought myself was one and I am wearing one now.
The title of The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit (film and novel) was supposed to be a criticism of post-war careerism and consumerism. What if you kind of liked the suit (sans hat)?
I liked this look and the look of the watches of this era. The first watch that I ever bought myself was one and I am wearing one now.
I think it’s a sharp look, but it’s a little too reserved to be “madly me” for me.
These are madly me.
I think it’s a sharp look, but it’s a little too reserved to be “madly me” for me.
It is what I have to wear "down in the mines."
It is what I have to wear "down in the mines."
I can "dig it."
Vive la différence as the French say...
Otherwise, we would all be wearing Submariners, Pepsis, Batmans, Daytonas, Explorers...
I really enjoy scanning through WRUW to see what is "Madly Me" to the community here.
Sometimes, it even gives me ideas for additions to the collection...
What bores me is the uniformity when people feel compelled to adjust their preferences to fit into someone else's idea of what is hip, cool, appropriate, etc.
One of my favorite songs from my youth was by The Kings "Anti Hero Man"
So you think that I'm an asshole
But I'm movin', movin' and you're standing still
And you think I've got a problem
Cause I'm hungry and I never get my fill
Life's too short for trivia, there is no time to waste
I do things deliberately and meet them face to face
I see people digging in and making all these plans
I just run and jump around I'm Anti Hero Man
So you think that I'm lonely
By your standards I'd rather be that way instead
And you think you've got the answer
There's no question, follow and you'll be misled
Let's not get too serious there is no time to waste
I do things deliberately and meet them face to face
I see people digging in and making all these plans
I just run and jump around I'm Anti Hero Man
https://youtu.be/N0Q2B-I7FJk
The title of The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit (film and novel) was supposed to be a criticism of post-war careerism and consumerism. What if you kind of liked the suit (sans hat)?
I liked this look and the look of the watches of this era. The first watch that I ever bought myself was one and I am wearing one now.
I love that look, mainly because it reminds me of my grandfather, who wore a suit every day. At work it causes too much confusion when you are part of technology team. Somebody might approach you and ask if were doing alright.
At my company headquarters I would probably wear a suit every day.
I'm old generation I have to try things on ,clothes, shoes ,watches . things always look different when you try them on ,also I think your taste changes as you get older also practicality,I now chronograph watches are out as I cannot read the small dials .point being we all evolve differently and have different tastes