Which Emperor Inspired Watch?

Only a few days into this trolling project and I am already out of ideas. Along comes @MegaBob to suggest a line of Roman Emperor inspired watches and a poll is born. Bonus is that I get to use a joke that is only funny if you are familiar with Suetonius. Here are the Emperors and the watches' nicknames (like Seiko).

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What about a Caligula ring watch?

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Shouldn’t Nero have something hotter than gold?
 

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Dammit now I wanna know the Suetonius joke.

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Vespasian is the clear choice... though I'd have gone with Trajan as the inspiration for a field watch. 

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Look at that wispy pube-like stache on Elagabalus!

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Caesar watches exist! 

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Sinnguy

Caesar watches exist! 

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Dum spiro spero

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Not gonna lie, probably the best idea I ever had.

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The Mulio would use a little workhorse movement, no doubt, so I went with B.

Accounts that Tiberius went skin diving with his minnows is questionable. He was well known for his Capri pants. 😬 

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Bobofet

The Mulio would use a little workhorse movement, no doubt, so I went with B.

Accounts that Tiberius went skin diving with his minnows is questionable. He was well known for his Capri pants. 😬 

@Bobofet gets the reference (or looked it up, either way...).

I have long doubted many of Suetonius' negative stories, as well as those by Cassius Dio and others. There was real gain to be had from a new emperor to trash the memory of a former emperor. Vespasian gets good press because, as the writers admit, he financially supported many of them.

Nothing in most of his life would have suggested that Tiberius would have cavorted with underage boys as an old man. He actually has one the genuine love stories of the ancient world with his first wife.

Vespasian sold mules to raise money when he was stationed in North Africa. He was a muleteer, or mulio. Many emperors could lay claim to a field watch. Trajan certainly could. Vespasian was stationed all over the empire, Germany, Britain, North Africa, and finally the Levant. Unfortunately, soldier emperors became the norm for two hundred years.

Elagabalus was either the biggest freak to ever be emperor, besting Caligula, Commodus, Domitian, Nero and others, or he got the worst press of all time. He seems to have run the empire and so I think that any truth to the stories of his proclivities has been exaggerated. 

Along that line of thinking, Nero didn't fiddle as Rome burnt, but he did make too many enemies. He seems to have been both a good and bad emperor. He build the Domus Aurea, but even that seems to have been exaggerated by later authors.

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Aurelian

@Bobofet gets the reference (or looked it up, either way...).

I have long doubted many of Suetonius' negative stories, as well as those by Cassius Dio and others. There was real gain to be had from a new emperor to trash the memory of a former emperor. Vespasian gets good press because, as the writers admit, he financially supported many of them.

Nothing in most of his life would have suggested that Tiberius would have cavorted with underage boys as an old man. He actually has one the genuine love stories of the ancient world with his first wife.

Vespasian sold mules to raise money when he was stationed in North Africa. He was a muleteer, or mulio. Many emperors could lay claim to a field watch. Trajan certainly could. Vespasian was stationed all over the empire, Germany, Britain, North Africa, and finally the Levant. Unfortunately, soldier emperors became the norm for two hundred years.

Elagabalus was either the biggest freak to ever be emperor, besting Caligula, Commodus, Domitian, Nero and others, or he got the worst press of all time. He seems to have run the empire and so I think that any truth to the stories of his proclivities has been exaggerated. 

Along that line of thinking, Nero didn't fiddle as Rome burnt, but he did make too many enemies. He seems to have been both a good and bad emperor. He build the Domus Aurea, but even that seems to have been exaggerated by later authors.

Former Latin teacher before I changed careers. ;-) One of my three evening reading books on the nightstand right now is Frontinus' Strategems.

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Bobofet

Former Latin teacher before I changed careers. ;-) One of my three evening reading books on the nightstand right now is Frontinus' Strategems.

My Latin was terrible. When I realized that I would need strong Latin and Greek, and German and French, I knew that Classics was closed to me and that I would have to read everything in translation.

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How did I miss this? 🤣😂🤣😂

I mean, I'm already thinking up homage brands named after Roman usurpers or a Year of the Four emperors themed minute repeater.