(#defsoneanddone) One & Done: Chapter Eight - Vacheron Constantin

Foreword

Welcome and welcome back! If you're new here, I'm exploring the 20 best-selling watch brands of 2022 (as seen on GQ Australia) and answering the question: If I could only have one watch from this brand FOREVER, which would I pick?

Today we are looking at Vacheron Constantin, but if you want to see my previous article where I covered Jaeger-LeCoultre, follow #defsoneanddone or click the link here!

#13: Vacheron Constantin – Grand Sphinx de Tanis

At lucky number 13 we meet the first of the widely acclaimed “Big Three,” but somehow Vacheron Constantin is generally still considered to be the Kevin Jonas of horology’s mythical trifecta.

Sorry, Kevin – you were the only good metaphor I could think of. No hard feelings, but are YOU married to Priyanka Chopra? Sorry again.

Despite this, VC remains my favourite of the three from a design standpoint, creating luxurious timepieces that bridge the gap between sporty practicality and luxurious old-world class. Ironically, or whatever, the watch I have chosen has what could probably be considered negative levels of practical application but makes up for it in bona fide, 110% absolute awesome: This is the Grand Sphinx de Tanis.

As one of the four watches Vacheron produced for their Tribute to Great Civilisations series, the Grand Sphinx stands at a sizeable but still wearable 42mm diameter, 12mm thick case entirely constructed of pink gold. However, you may have noticed that there is an intriguing feature that catches the eye. Care to guess? No? It’s not too obvious?

If you guessed “the colossal, mind-blowing, intricately detailed sphinx face in the middle of the watch,” then you would be correct! This timepiece lets you carry a piece of the Louvre—quite literally—on your wrist. And I mean it in the most literal sense possible. The authentic Grand Sphinx de Tanis, purchased by the Louvre from Henry Salt's collection in 1826, now resides in the crypt of the esteemed national art museum, in all its pristine, noseless glory.

Fun Egypt fact for y’all – did you know that woolly mammoths and the Great Pyramids of Giza existed at the same time? There is evidence of woolly mammoths having been alive in Siberia during and even after the construction of the pyramids! I’m sure they couldn’t book a flight to see them though, sadly.

In collaboration with the Louvre, Vacheron Constantin created this absolute watch masterpiece. Every single element – from the six-times-fired enamel dial, to the Champleve enamelling to age the frieze, to the engraved golden hieroglyphics. You may as well just put a flashing neon sign above your head that says, “I LOVE ANCIENT EGYPT” and wear it concurrently with this horological gem.

Seriously, if you were way too into Horrible Histories like I was as a kid, this is the watch for you.

Now, here is the million-dollar question (assuming you have a million dollars lying about after splurging on this piece) - ‘How in the Hell do you even read the time?’ Not to worry though, VC has you covered. Small cut-outs in the 1,5,7 and 11 positions show you the minutes, date, day, and hours respectively, all run by an in-house automatic movement. Although to be honest, you won’t be looking at the case back anyway.

“Oh, but it may be beautiful, but even still the watch is just not legible! It doesn’t even work as a watch!” And hey, that’s an astute observation and a factually correct argument! My response? Shut up. I do what I want.

In summation, the Grand Sphinx de Tanis is a whimsical representation of the artistic heights that Vacheron Constantin can reach as part of their Tribute to Great Civilisations series. It perfectly signifies their dedication and finesse to design whilst immersing its wearer in the timeless allure of ancient Egypt. Practicality may take a backseat, but for me, a guy that loves history, extravagance and horological artistry, this watch is brilliant at all of that and more.

I had tons of fun writing this piece, and I hope you had fun reading it! Next up, horology's favourite punching bag - Hublot!