Who should be the Ambassador for Spaghetti Scameti?

It's really a tough question which can only be answered with the input of a wider pool of knowledge. Breitling has ambassadors and so are TAG, Omega and many other brands selling products that are inferior to Spaghetti Scameti. A brand ambassador has to be someone who is known publicly and who can represent the values of the brand (aka money). A modern herald in other words. Oh, and he also needs to be alive otherwise the pool of candidate would also include P.T. Barnum and Bernie Madoff. The first candidate is Jeffrey Skilling of ENRON, because if you need a Lambo or two, then you'd better use money that no one can explain where it came from. The second candidate is Martin Shkreli of MSMB, because of his genius in product pricing strategy and his ability to create artificial scarcity of life saving drugs through multi thousand percentage price hikes. The third candidate is Sam Bankman-Fried (SBF) of FTX, because why create money out of thin air when you can just trade in crypto or dip into the funds of your affiliated company? I updated the poll because of @SpecKTator mention of Elizabeth Holmes, which brings us our fourth candidate, because who else can do a better job of revolutionizing and disrupting a market with or without middlemen, or even a product? So which one of them is your choice, or maybe there are other candidates that I didn't think of for this position? I know that it's a tough job, but someone has to do it!
304 votes

This guy

Image
SpecKTator

This guy

Image

He's an actor, selling Spaghetti Scameti is a serious business. Pass.

Image
TimeJunkie
Image

Nah, he doesn't looks Italian enough. Pass.

Catskinner

He's an actor, selling Spaghetti Scameti is a serious business. Pass.

Fine, how about Elizabeth Holmes

Or Bernie Madoff

SpecKTator

Fine, how about Elizabeth Holmes

Oh...I forgot about her, good choice!

Nothing sells better than wearing a black turtleneck and staring at you without blinking.

Catskinner

Oh...I forgot about her, good choice!

Nothing sells better than wearing a black turtleneck and staring at you without blinking.

All she wants is your blood

SpecKTator

Or Bernie Madoff

He's dead which makes it a bit difficult unless you volunteer to schlep his coffin around.

Catskinner

He's dead which makes it a bit difficult unless you volunteer to schlep his coffin around.

He鈥檚 the 鈥渕iddleman鈥

SpecKTator

All she wants is your blood

Nothing wrong with this in corporate America.

Image
SpecKTator

He鈥檚 the 鈥渕iddleman鈥

It's all good and fine but we are looking here for an ambassador.

SpecKTator

Fine, how about Elizabeth Holmes

I updated the poll and also tried to credit you, but the text box of the poll won't allow for tagging. So sorry.

Catskinner

I updated the poll and also tried to credit you, but the text box of the poll won't allow for tagging. So sorry.

Appreciate it 馃憤

Image
wristocrat

Gotta get a Madoff option in here

Sorry, but fictional characters or dead people are not allowed.

Crazy_Dana

I'll claim it too if they pay me enough.

... about $1.50 ? ;)

whystopatone

What about Jeffery Epstein? The biggest douche of all time. He's probably still wearing a RM and hiding out on some private beach island.

You have to be the right kind of a douche to be a brand ambassador for Spaghetti Scameti and being alive also help meeting the minimum requirements for this position.

There are enough venal and greedy famous people who are alive without having to resort to grave robbing.

edzkar

Anthony "Scam God" Farer.

Image

Too much of a small fry to consider. If you are mercenary enough to sell your good name and integrity then you'd better go all in and be a proper big time criminal.

Catskinner

You have to be the right kind of a douche to be a brand ambassador for Spaghetti Scameti and being alive also help meeting the minimum requirements for this position.

There are enough venal and greedy famous people who are alive without having to resort to grave robbing.

10-4

Pablito

Elizabeth Holmes is actually quite sexy in a Lady Macbeth kind of way. My vote's for Martin Shkreli who has no redeeming features... and needs a slap.

Image

Sexy? She looks like a character from the Stepford Wives movie that managed to step out of the screen and is trying to blend in.

WhooHoo!!

I got it!! Justice prevailed and I achieved my goal

Image
Catskinner

Sexy? She looks like a character from the Stepford Wives movie that managed to step out of the screen and is trying to blend in.

Yeah, I know. But she's got that Lady Macbeth/femme fatale/slightly evil thing going on. Okay, I might need therapy. 馃檮